#################################################{((((((}##########################,
 ################################################{)))))))))##########################,
 ###      ####     ###   ##  ###################((((( _  _))##########################,
 ###    ######  #  ###      ###################)))))) . (.((###########################,
 ######   ####     ###   ##  ##################((((((    >)))###########################.
 ###      ####  #  ###   ###  #################))))))   - /(############################'
 ###      ####  #  ###   ####  ############.-'  (((((.--' )))###########################'
 ##################.-'''''-._##########_.-'         :: (((((############################'
 #################.`          '-. ###.-'     _.-''  :::)))))))##########################'
 ################:              ':-:    _.-' :'   .:::((((((############################'
 ################:               .:   .:: : :     ::::)))))))###########################'
 #################:.          ..::   .:: : '      ::::((((((############################'
 ##################:.        (:::  .:::: : :      o ::)))))))###########################'
 ######_.-.#########:.        \/  :-'-'-'-'`'-.-'`:: :((((((############################'
 #__.-'   _\#######_ :.        \ /#############))):.  :))))))###########################'
 (    .-' ;;'-.-''' '':.        :#############(((((:.  :((((############################'
 #```'-..-.;._  _.-''-.\         :#############))))):.   ))))###########################'
 #__.-'   _\_.`'        \        :############(((((((:. '(((############################'
(    _.-' ;;                     :####################:. '---.__########################'
 `'''-....;;,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,;,___:######################\:..b===='#######################'
 ###########################################################originalartistunknown#######'
 #####################################################################back#email#######'
 ######################################################################################`

Written for my 12th grade English class. I received a B on this piece. And yes, that is a lovely little piece of
sexual innuendo at the end of the fourth paragraph. Ah, to be young (AND HUNG AND FULL OF CUM WELL AT LEAST YOUNG).

Kung Fu Fighting was a song that not only spoke to generations and generations of asians that practiced the "ancient
Chinese art" (actually, it's a Taiwanese art), but also the mass public, who at the time was very much unaware of 
Kung Fu. Or for that matter Kung Fu fighting. Thanks to the efforts of the classically trained musical stylings of
one Carl Douglas, Kung Fu fighting was becoming a national past time. Quickly taking the title away from such
American favorites as Rugbie and Soccer.

Carl Douglas himself actually new very little of the art. "Listen, I'm just a black guy from Queens who probably
saw 'Enter the Dragon' one too many times," Douglas said in a 1998 interview with Rolling Stone magazine, "Quite
frankly, I don't know much about Asian culture. Hell, I wouldn't even be able to tell you where China was on a map."
Despite Douglas's lack of knowledge about the birthplace of Kung Fu (as well as Kung Fu fighting), he had two
follow-up singles to the 1974 hit, which were decidedly not as popular.

"I wrote 'Bukkake Burai Fighter' right after 'Kung Fu Fighting' was a big hit," Douglas says in the same interview,
"The lyrics went 'What's on your face? / A-don't use that mace / It's a Japanese natural high / Bukkake Burai'. I
admit, not nearly as catchy as the lyrics to Kung Fu Fighting, but come on man, it ain't bad from a kid from Queens.
I have to admit, my next song, 'Teriyaki Tango' was considered incredibly offensive in many Asian circles, and in
fact, due to some sort of a court order, I'm not even allowed to repeat even one line of those lyrics."

As the song's popularity waned, coming into 1975, so did the actual past-time of Kung Fu fighting. Kung Fu fighting
dojos around the world closed their doors for good due to Kung Fu fighting over kill. "My business doing good until
Carl Douglas stick his nose in things," says Wang Hung Chou, who owned Nin-Nin's Dojo NYC for 25 years prior to
1975, "When he come it ruined everything!"

The song seemed to be forever lost in the midst of one-hit wonder world forever, until in the year 2001, Kung Fu
fighting fever hit America again. Carl Douglas teamed up with two of the biggest American powerhouse producers
(David Wrong and Rick Right) to come up with a remixed version of the song, with brand new vocals entitled "Kung Fu 
Fighting 2K1". "Listen, if you could not tell this to Carl, it would be much appreciated, but we're not really
producers. In fact, this is not even a real recording studio," began producer David Wrong, "I don't even think the
man has even ever been in a real recording studio. And just for the record, I play both the parts of David Wrong AND
Rick Right. I walk out of the room for a second and put on crazy sunglasses and a wig and say I'm the opposite of
who I just was. It was funny at first, but now it's just sad. I can't stop doing this because if I did I think it
would shatter everything Carl holds dear in his life. I feel so sorry for that poor, misguided soul."

So there you have it. Kung Fu Fighting - a song that inspired an entire generation of Kung Fu, as well as the
fighting of Kung Fu. And for that, we have one man to thank for - Mr. Carl Douglas.